Some Final Thoughts for Now…
Monday, May 3rd, 2010
Hello friends,
So, it is Over….
But not really.
I am in Portland, Maine and am about to hitchhike back towards Michigan.
I am told that I should feel a sense of accomplishment. I don’t feel that. I am told I have seen and done things that most will never see or do. I know this, but it doesn’t change how I feel now.
Right now, I just feel mildly melancholy.
I also feel an irresistible urge to deactivate my facebook account, close my computer, and stow away my camera.
So I am going to. It is a little early. I said I would write everyday for a year and I am few weeks shy.
I just don’t have anything else to say. And I trust myself that it is best for me and everyone, to just shut up for awhile.
On second thought, here are a few things I picked up over the past year:
*People are not all good. We are both. All of us.
*A lot of people are really scared. Me too, sometimes.
*When you live your dreams, it is not perfect. You still get sad, angry, etc. You just feel more alive. More tingly and smiley. You start to understand what all those mysterious artists were talking about in their quotes.
*There is no end. No chair to sit in and rest and feel like you will never have troubles again.
*It all matters and it all doesn’t.
*You can’t have anything you have ever dreamed. But you can have more than you think.
*If you aren’t living how you want, you can change. And please do. It is hard to be in your presence. If you don’t know how, there are people that will help. Just ask.
*If you are living how you want. Thank you. You nourish me.
*Other people can teach you much. But you have to learn for yourself.
*It feels better to be loving than to feel anything else. You can feel loving more and if you don’t know how, keep asking people. You will eventually find someone that can teach you.
*Life is so funny!!! Even when it hurts… actually, more funny, when it hurts. If you are avoiding the hurt, you are really missing out. Seriously.
*I miss being challenged and people telling me the truth.
I am sure I could come up with more, but you will be fine without it.
No, I have one more thing to say.
I love you.
Till I have something else to say,
Benjamin
Ps. If this was a buzzkill for you, here is short poem I read recently that made me smile;
“Your life is your life
don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is light somewhere.
it may not be much light but it
beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you
chances.
know them, take them.
you can’t beat death but
you can beat death
in life,
sometimes.
and the more often you
learn to do it,
the more light there will
be.
your life is your life,
know it while you have
it.
you are marvelous
the gods wait to delight
in
you.













